Pumpkins, detoxing, and workouts.

      I did so well this weekend! I'm so proud! I even made pumpkin bread with cream cheese frosting and fit it into my day. It so so amazing and so worth it. I love being able to eat healthy, lose weight and still eat what I love. It's all about portion control. It's so simple, and that's why it's so sad that sometimes people who are trying to lose weight feel horrible about themselves when they eat one thing thats considered "unhealthy." In my mind, it's okay to eat something unhealthy once in a while, as long as it's in moderation and you keep the portion in check. EVERYTHING IS OKAY IN MODERATION. That is how I have been able to even do this, still eat what I want!
      I'm considering a detox this week. I haven't done a serious one in at least 3 years. I was reading an article and they suggested detoxing at least 4 times a year. I'm going to start doing this. It really helps flush your body out of  chemicals, and other crap. It's really not that hard either. The one I'm going to try this week is just eating nothing processed. So, just eating fruits, veggies, meats, eggs, 100% whole wheat breads and pastas,  nuts (all organic) and just drinking water, tea or coffee. So no more pretzels, granola bars,or anything out of a bag. This won't be to difficult. It's only for 5 days, so I'm actually excited for this. I'm excited to see how much I will lose, and  how much better I feel.
    I finally made a decision about my workouts. I am going to keep my memebership. I have some time Tuesdays and Thursdays, so no matter how tired I am, I'm dragging myself there. I can also go on Saturdays. With my detox, and new workout schedule, I shoulld really lose the 10 pounds before November that I am like dieing to lose. Im excited to start my new plan this week! I will keep updating!

Update,

      Since my last post I have really been hanging in there. I feel so good! It's almost that time of the month, so other then the occasional night-time cravings I have been doing fabulous. I have had a very busy week, school and work blahblah, but I'm really proud of myself for keeping on track. I still haven't figured out my work-out situation. Other then the walks I take maybe 3 times a week, I have been doing no other exercise. I'm leaning towards canceling my memebership and just expanding my gym here at home. Here is my Journal entry for today;

Breakfast: eggwhite and cheese on english muffin: 190 cals.
                strawberries: 40 cals.
                 coffee: 50 cals.

Snack: cheese: 70 cals.
            nuts: 100 cals.

Lunch: turkey sandwhich on whole wheat: 200 cals.
            blueberries: 40 cals.

Dinner: 4oz sirlion: 180
           small baked potatoe w/ 2 tbs sour cream : 200
           side salad: 50 cals.

 snack: 1/2 cup strawberry ice cream on a waffer cone: 140
           Specail K bar: 100
           Organic fruit chews: 80

TOTAL:1440 cals. WATER: 84.5 oz.

       Today was very busy, I would usually eat about 200 calories more, but I'm not hungry and not complaining! I rarely set such difficult goals, however, I really want to lose 10 pounds before November. I think if I really start working out regularly again, this won't be to difficult. Let's see how it goes :) That would bring my over-all loss too 55 lbs!

My weekend.

        Oh boy, were to begin.. I will just lay it out for you right now. I fucked up. I had a great weekend, don't get me wrong. I spent it in Long Island with Joe. We had a great time, we went to a movie, shopping, looked for halloween costumes, and ate SO BAD. I am feeling it today. I feel heavy and sluggish, and I have a stomach ache. This is how I will typically feel if I eat out of my norm. Ill just go through how I did.

       Friday during the day, I was SO busy, I didn't plan and just wasn't thinking about my eating. Sometimes this happens, life gets in the way. I didn't eat horribly, I just didn't eat. This is what usually happens when I am busy, I don't eat for a long period of time, then I eat something unhealthy cause I want whatever is the quickest. I got home from school and had a bowl of beef lo mein. No comment on that. Then I left my house quickly after and was still hungry after filling up on carbs. I grabbed a bag a quater full of chex mix (great choice). Then when I got to Joe's school, I ate some MORE of his chex mix. I hatv no explanation for this. We went to the movies and then after we stopped at Applebees. We decided to do the "2 for 20" thing they had going on, because we are both broke. Obviously, nothing really healthy on this menu. We got spicy queso dip for an appitizer. It was so good, but so bad. Then for my entree I had the oriental chicken salald. I knew when I ordered this is wasn't healthy even though it was a salad, but I had a plan. It is a salad, with toasted almonds, cabbage, chicken with like, 2 inch thick breading, and a creamy dressing. The first thing I did was remove about 3/4 of the chicken, and only ate half. I felt much better about my choice. I can't remember if I ate anything afterward.
         Saturday, I knew I needed to redeem myself. Breakfast, Honey Nut Cheerios with milk, some fruit, and coffee. Lunch, footlong veggie on wheat from Subway. Dinner, Lean Cusine (Balsamic Glazed Chicken w/ rice and veggies) , and a huge salad with low fat italian dressing. Then I got an individual sized container of apple pie ice cream, only 190 calories and totally worth it. That brought my calories for the day to, 1315. Then, that night. I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. I was craving pizza so I got smart ones mini pizza, 300 calories, had the top of a muffin probably like another 300 calories, then some more chex mix! I hate chex mix I don't know why I ate so much of it this weekend. All that probably brought my calories up to like 2100 or something. I am so mad. But this happenes. There is no explanation. Its hard when I'm not home, or in a place with 100% healthy choices. I know it's wrong, but I do it anyway.
          Today is a new day. I feel crappy, so I am doing my raw day. Fruit for breakfast with coffee and some toast. Salad for lunch, and a very small dinner with extra veggies. This is how I help my body get back on track after my 2 days of bliss. Back to buisness! I'm actually excited to feel better. Eating unhealthy is fun when it happens, but afterwards It helps me rememebr how shitty I used to feel, and how much feeling good about what you eat, and how you feel is so important, another lesson learned, and another weekend behind me. So happy to be getting back on track!

Making some serious changes.

        I am a facebook addict, there, I admitted it. Well I'm happy to finally say I have deleted my account! I did this for several reasons;

1. I am sitting on my butt too much cause of it.
2. I waste my time.
3. I need to work harder on school, and it distracts me.
4. It's not healthy from me to be sitting on the computer for so long everyday, I need to move!
5. I causes drama.

       So that is that :)

        Anyway, I have been doing great with my healthy eating. I did have acouple bad weeks because I went back to school and started a new job. I am so happy everything is back on track.  My main issue now is finding time to workout! I am so busy all day. I am up around 7:30am everyday, work till I have school and Im in school till around 9. When I get off school I just want to come home and sleep. This is a major problem. I want to get some more workout tools for my house and maybe cancel my gym membership? It's a big decision!
        I have been feeling really happy latley, which I think is helping a lot with my healthy eating. I love when things go great for me, it allows me to just focus 100% on my change. When I have a bad day or week, it's really hard or me to balance everything. I have really been trying to think about why I am eating when I am eating it. If I go to the pantry or fridge I always ask myself if I am really hungry or if I'm just upset. This has helped me a lot latley. Now, in my food journal I write a relection for the day.
        My weigh in was today, I lost another 2 pounds! I will update after the weekend!

Trade in the bad, for good :)

        I love going out to eat. I love being with my family and friends and enjoying good food. I knew when I started my change, eating at resturants would be difficult. However, it turned out to be rather simple. I wanted to share this tip right in the beginning, because I know a major myth about changing your life-style is, you can no longer go out to eat, or grab a quick bite between classes or get your favorite drink from starbucks-NOT TRUE! You just have to do your research.
        I have not found one resturant that I enjoy to not have their calories posted somewhere online. My tip is, PLAN. Before you go out, just go online, look at the menu, pick what you want to have and check the calories of that item. I have put together a list of my favorite places to eat, or to just grab a drink. I looked up what I used to eat there, and the calories and what I eat now and the calories. I want to show how much healthier you can eat if  you trade in the bad for the good. This is one of the best things you can do so you can still enjoy yourself, eat what you want, and stick to your change! Here are just a few examples-

Dunkin Dounts-
Traded a- Medium Vanilla Iced Coffee, light with cream and two sugars (300 cals)
for a - Medium Iced Coffee, light with milk and one splenda (50 cals)
Saves- 250 cals.

Traded a- Bacon, Egg, and Cheese on a plain bagel (510 cals)
for a - Eggwhite and Cheese on an english muffin (270 cals)
Saves- 240 cals.

Starbucks-
Traded a- Grande Caramel Frap (390 cals)
for a - Grande Iced Green Tea, sweetened (80 cals)
Saves-310 cals.

Mcdonalds-
Traded a- Quarter Pounder w/ Cheese & fries (890 cals.)
for a - Caesar salad with Balsamic Vinaigrette (260 cals)
Saves-630 cals.

Traded- Two Chocolate chips Cookies (320 cals)
for a-Fruit and Walnuts Salad (210 cals)
Saves- 110 cals.

Panera-
Traded a- Bacon Turkery Bravo w/ Chips (990 cals.)
for a- BBQ chopped chicken salad W/out Tortia strips, W/ bread on the side (540 cals)
Saves-450 cals

Applebees-
Traded an- Apple Walnut Chicken Salad  (1000 cals.)
for an- Asiago Peppercorn steak W/Veggies and Potatoes (390 cals)
Saves-610 cals.

Chilies-
Traded a- BBQ Girlled Chicken Salad (1050 cals)
for a- Guiltless Caribbean Salad  (550 cals.)
Saves-500 cals.

Ruby Tuesday-
Traded a- Chicken and Broccoli Pasta  (1560 cals.)
for- BBQ Chicken W/ White Cheddar Mashed Potatoes and Broccoli (550 cals)
Saves-1010 cals.


        As you can see, you can still eat at the same places you love, just A LOT healthier. I hope this inspires you to really look at what you are eating, especailly if you are trying to make changes for your health.

What I am doing about it.

        If there is one thing I have learned in the past 11 years about myself and my weight issue, it's that I cannot force myself to do anything I am not truly ready to do. I knew 100% I was ready to lose my weight and I quickly figured out a program for myself. I gathered all the information I had learned about food, calories, healthy-living, and excersise over the years and on Febuary 18, 2010 I wrote in my food dairy for the first time. I wrote out what I ate at my meals, how many calories they were, what I did for excersise that day, and how much water I drank. 1810 calories, 30 minutes on the tredmill and 7 bottles of water. After repeating this day 7 times, by the end of my first week I had lost 4 pounds. I could not beleive it. I knew this would work and I needed to continue.
        The second week on my plan, I lost 5.4 pounds. That made my total loss for a two week period 9.4 pounds. I was so mad at myself. I thought, if this was all I had to do why did I wait so long. I remember crying. Crying for joy because I had lost nearly 10 pounds, and also crying because I knew I could have done this sooner. The third week I did the same exact meal plan and excerise, but only lost 1 pound. I was happy. I knew that if I lost a lot more in such a short amount of time I would give up for being to successful. Thats just how werid I am, I guess.
        By a month or two into my plan I realized how truly difficult changing your life-style is. Something as simple as drinking a beverage other than water would ruin my whole day. This became a job. I had to count my calories, only eat 1600 a day (give or take a few), make time to workout in my already filled up schedule, if I was going to be eating anywhere other than home, figure out what I would eat, look it up online and make sure it would fit into my day, and get enough sleep. Just thinking about it all at once makes my head hurt! Then, I really wasn't angry at myself anymore. I knew why all my diets had failed before, I just wasn't in the right place in my life yet. I didn't have the time management skills, sense of responsibilty, and the will-power yet to actually achieve something so great.
        7 months later I am still following the same basic plan. I have had some really bad days, even weeks and months. There have been times I went out to dinner and made huge mistakes. At the beginning of the summer I didn't lose a pound for over a month and a half. I will have an amazing day and totally ruin it with a binge at night. Yes, I have fucked up royally. However, I know that it's okay. You can't try to do this and except to be perfect, or I promise it will not work. You have to reflect on the situation and figure out why you made a bad choice. For example, I know that if I sit in my kitchen bored I will go and eat for no reason. So now, I don't sit in there unless I am eating a planned meal, talking to my family or doing homework. Changing your life like I did really makes you look at yourself and figure out a lot.
        The point of the matter is, you can be successful and still be human. You can hit major bumps in the road and keep going. It is what you have to do if you want to lose a significant amount of weight, make mistakes and learn.
    

A quick overveiw.

          "What is she eating?" "Is she active?" "This is a problem that should be adressed now rather than in her future." I could remember sitting in my doctors office at the young age of 8, listening to my doctor talk to my Mom about me, and my weight like I wasn't even in the room. All my negitive feelings about my body and the way I look began there. As I look back now, she was obviously just doing her job. However, her just doing her job made me feel really bad about myself. It is sad to think 11 years ago, when I was still a child, I was faced with the harsh realization that I was "fat" and I needed to change.  I could rememeber really not understanding what to do, or even understanding how I was different. I knew I didn't look like my two petite sisters, and that I no longer fit into the cute pajamas and back-to-school clothes at Kids-R-Us. I remember feeling like I wanted to be like them, but I didn't know how to be.
         Fast track a few years to my first few months in middle school and the torture I had to endure everyday by my peers and classmates, I definatly knew I was different. Unlike my 8 year old self, I began to understand what I could do to change it. For as long as I could rememeber from this point on I was always on a "diet."
         Diets don't work. That is something I am positive of now. Through-out the years, I have been on atleast a hundred "diets," South Beach, Atkins, Weight-Watchers On-Line, E-Diets, diet pills, seeing nutrishonists, a personal diet-consultant, starving myself ect... Nothing worked! I just gained and gained. I felt like something was wrong. I had gotten my sugar levels tested when I was 13 and again at 18. Both came back high. I am now on Medication for that. I also was discovered at 18 to have a vitamin D deficany, which my  endocrinologist says does have an effect on my metabolism. With both of my medical issuses squared away, I finally felt like this was my chance to lose the weight that I had accumulated over the past 11 years.
         I have been on my life-style change since Febuary. Along with constant activity, eating 1600 calories a day, and keeping a food journal daily I have lost about 45 pounds! I cannot express how proud I am of myself. For the first time EVER I have been able to do this on my own. When I started dropping the weight my first thoughts were, "I have to help other people just like me." This is why I am doing this blog. I want to help every single person who has struggled with there weight and feels trapped in a body that isn't theirs. You are going to read about my bad times, horrible times, great times and struggles. Yes I have lost 45 pounds, and wow has it been difficult, and wow do I have much more to lose! I will update this blog frequently with how my days go, how my weekly weigh-ins I have set up for myself go, and tips on anything I can think of to share. I can't wait to get started!